2/19/24 - Update on My Husband

Sugs I can only imagine what your going through right now. it's not your fault, it's hard to deal with what your going through my husband was at his wits end with me in rehab & the hosp. When I was in rehab I made sure they did their jobs & kept on top of things, when I went to the dinning room to eat I seen people there that weren't looked after or cared for & it just broke my heart in a million pieces, that's why I ate in my room.

Oh, Linda. Bless you both. I’ll keep praying.

I am so sorry Linda.. I think I would ask to speak to the rehab director to voice your concerns..in an appropriate way of course. You can't make them care, but the squeaky wheel gets the grease.

I’m so sorry. I’m weeping because I see my aunt and my great-grandfather in everything you say. You know you have my prayers.

So sorry Linda. Hope things improve. It's no ones fault. The fall could have happened inside.

I know it is hard to see him like that but please don't blame yourself for what happened. It was not your fault. I am sorry that the place he is staying arent giving him the care and attention that he needs and deserves. Sadly a lot of rehab facilities are like that. I am glad his cousin is there for both of you. I am praying for your hubby and for you. You are always in my thoughts. If you ever need a friend to talk to you can message me on here anytime.

Sad to read that but it's not your fault, so stop thinking that. He could have had the stroke just lying in bed. Since he's fallen out of bed more than once, perhaps he is continuing to have ministrokes.

I'm so sorry, I pray that the rehab gets their stuff together to actually help him. Also, if you'd gone out to get the package the you'd be in rehab instead, that wouldn't be good either.

Don't blame yourself for the porch fall, you do not know for certain that is what brought this on, it may have occured anyways. I remember my days working in a long term care facility. There were never enough pairs of hands come meal time, and sometimes residents were taken out first as they were not able to be in that community type of setting, others were left in the hopes that they would nibble on some of the food left to eat. Having the room and the residents all cleaned up and sitting in their rooms or lying in their beds was not living. They need to be up to build their strength and improve their circulation. Have faith in the system.

You can't blame yourself for what happened

If you'd gone out to get that package, your husband might have fallen indoors. You can't blame yourself for anything that happened! You have been a good wife and terrible things happen to other families, too. Your husband needs to be fed, nurses-aides are suppose to make sure this is done. Facilities around here are the same way. People act like they couldn't care less, about performing quality healthcare. Yet God can perform a miracle! xoxo

You can't blame yourself. As awful as the situation is, in some ways, his falling on the porch might have actually saved his life. Always a silver lining, even if it is sometimes hard to find in the moment. I wish things were better though. Hang in there.

I am so sorry to hear about how he is doing...glad the place is clean but that sounds about the only good thing. Hopefully they'll start being more helpful and things will improve. Sounds very scary, I am so sorry....

Please don't blame yourself. It's not your fault. Take care. Will continue to pray for both of you.

I´m so very sorry! Sometimes nurses should go and get other jobs I´m always thinking of you two.

Very difficult to like post. Please don't blame yourself about that package retrieval. You did not know this would happen. Only if you knew of the possibility, and still went ahead with it, you would be guilty of it. As usual, I am going to advocate Ensure. My father was falling too in 2021 and 2022. Ensure, glynase, stamlo 5 mg, setbrain, ecosprin, Telma 40 1/2 tablet, vitamin D, are the medicines he is being administered. Prior to setbrain, I was giving him Syndopa (which is for Parkinsons ..it did not help much). I even took some help with Homeopathy and gastroenterologist. He is no longer falling. Prior to falling he was taking stamlo beta I think, and trental and glynase. I don't like to interfere with others medication. The doctor knows the best. But Ensure is a great thing I feel. Even Setbrain. I don't know if you all get setbrain. But Ensure will help. Is it allowed to bring him home Linda? A couple of weeks diaper changing is the tougher part. Rest of the time, sugar and blood pressure monitoring giving him medicines, ensure, soup, and prescribed diet - I took to teasing my father and thank god he has sense of humor so he laughs and somehow remains out of gloom. You'd do a better job than those lax nurses. Care giving is tough. But it is tougher to watch loved one being neglected in facility like that I feel. If it is allowed and possible, you might want to consider it. I truly am sorry and you are truly in my prayers. God knows such period can be tough on anyone. Love, hugs, tc. Don't forget yourself. Indulge yourself. Treats. Otherwise, self pity will overtake.

I feel so sad, hugs

I would have some cross words with the manager of the facility.

That must have been such a hard visit. My sister used to go every day to feed my mother but if she didn't, one of the nurses would feed her.

Linda, stop blaming yourself about that package. He would have fallen somewhere else; it was simply circumstantial. It is NOT your fault. His heart being so weak is no doubt the big reason that he fell. Heart controls a lot of things. He's suffered confusion and got lost, etc. You had no control over when and where he could fall. I am actually sort of surprised he was sent to a rehab. I've never known a rehab to actually feed someone, or to have the staff to sit with anyone to keep them safe. It's like they didn't know what to do with him, so he went there? I'm not trying to be critical of you in saying that. I asked my nurse practitioner friend about this, and she said, no, they shouldn't have sent him to a rehab. Hopefully, he can be moved somewhere better and get more attention and care than he is getting now.