Excuse Me! What are you doing?
By DianneN
@DianneN (254926)
United States
February 6, 2026 8:46am CST
I was about to go upstairs to get dressed one morning around September when I spotted the mother of my across the street neighbor standing in front of my lawn taking photos. She’s here on a 10 year visa and barely speaks a word of English.
When I asked her what she was doing, she waved, so I waved back.
I asked her again what she was doing, and she told me my grass looked beautiful. I must have embarrassed her, because she turned around, ran across the street, up her driveway, and into the house.
However, I know she wasn’t taking photos of my lawn, because I watched her enlarge her camera for closeups of my flowers.
My point is that I better not see my flowers growing in their yard. They copy everything I wear, got a new roof right after we had ours put in, put in, an island somewhat like ours, painted their house the same color as ours, uses our turf company, decorated trees with fairy lights shortly after I’ve put ours up, etc…. A neighbor told us that their yard is becoming a mirror image of ours and not in a good way.
Thanks for letting me vent. Do you think I am being irrational?
Photo is mine. Once I got dressed, I went to the spot where she took photos just to see what she saw.
19 people like this
21 responses
@FourWalls (86710)
• United States
6 Feb
Can you go rent a $700,000 RV to park in your driveway for a couple of days, just to see if she’ll buy one? 
6 people like this
@DianneN (254926)
• United States
7 Feb
It’s extremely annoying and I feel my blood pressure rising as I think about it now. It’s my clothes colors, my husband’s shirts, my raincoats, tee shirts, hats, dresses old and new, boots, and even my nightgown! We turn our outside lights on in broad daylight to help service people find our house and they instantly turn their lights on. Same car colors, too. They watch me garden, have peeked out from behind trees, and, and, and, and…….. I try to wait until they leave before going outside to garden or even to get my mail now.
1 person likes this
@DaddyEvil (174478)
• United States
7 Feb
Unfortunately, ideas on how to make a yard look nice aren't/can't be copyrighted. That would (and has) irritated me at times, too. I just ignore it and do things my way and hope they get tired of copying what we're doing.
1 person likes this
@DaddyEvil (174478)
• United States
7 Feb
@DianneN They must think you know what you're doing so they're doing that, too. (They're in a strange-to-them country and they're afraid to set a foot wrong is how I'd see that. *shrug*
1 person likes this
@DianneN (254926)
• United States
7 Feb
@DaddyEvil The husband is Caucasian born and bred in the USA. Wife, her parents aren’t. Two cute kids.
1 person likes this
@DianneN (254926)
• United States
7 Feb
That’s so very true, but it’s more than just my yard. It’s the colors that I wear, my raincoats, dresses, shorts, tee shirts, boots, pashminas, and even my nightgown that irritate me to no end. We turn on our outdoor lights even in bright sunlight when expecting service people to find our house more easily. They instantly put their lights on, too!
1 person likes this
@moffittjc (128835)
• Gainesville, Florida
6 Feb
To borrow a popular literary phrase, "plagiarism is the sincerest form of flattery." She is copying you because of how great your house and yard are!
But it does seem strange that she literally does everything you do. I love Four Walls' suggestion about the RV though!
2 people like this
@moffittjc (128835)
• Gainesville, Florida
8 Feb
@DianneN Whoah, that is definitely stalker material right there. It's one thing if you copy something beautiful or stylish in your yard, but when you start copying every little detail of your neighbor's life, then it's crossing a red line. Please be careful around this person.
1 person likes this
@DianneN (254926)
• United States
8 Feb
@moffittjc so true.
Hubs doesn’t want me to wave at them let alone talk to them anymore. I try not to, but only say hello back if they say it first and hightail it into the house or backyard.
And it’s not only the wife and her mother, but her ugly monster of a husband, too.
1 person likes this
@DianneN (254926)
• United States
7 Feb
@JudyEv Exactly! Last year my hairdresser gave me bangs, which my husband hated. Guess who gave herself bangs? I let mine grow out. Guess who else did. I usually wear my hair in a bob, and twice she’s done it. I forgot all about that. She cuts her hair herself and it’s usually long. I’m pretty sure her mother, who arrived last May, gave her her last bob.
I like your wig idea, but my husband told me that I look like a mouse in short hair
Thanks for understanding this horrible situation.
Thanks for understanding this horrible situation.1 person likes this
@JudyEv (382104)
• Rockingham, Australia
7 Feb
@DianneN That is really too much. 
It's akin to stalking really. I'm trying to think of how you could counteract it but can't come up with much. Does she wear her hair like yours? If so, buy a really short wig and wear it till she gets her hair cut then go back to your natural style. 
It's akin to stalking really. I'm trying to think of how you could counteract it but can't come up with much. Does she wear her hair like yours? If so, buy a really short wig and wear it till she gets her hair cut then go back to your natural style. 1 person likes this
@GardenGerty (169477)
• United States
7 Feb
Imitation is the sincerest form of flattery, so it is said, but that is creepy in a way.
1 person likes this
@wolfgirl569 (135770)
• Marion, Ohio
6 Feb
Imitation is the greatest form of flattery. So be proud of what you have done
1 person likes this
@RasmaSandra (98004)
• Daytona Beach, Florida
7 Feb
That would annoy be as well. Sounds like a bunch of copycats.
1 person likes this
@Marilynda1225 (91099)
• United States
6 Feb
Nope that would annoy the heck out of me. I can't believe that they're copying you and have no vision of their own. In a crazy way it's a compliment to you but still a bit weird.
1 person likes this
@DianneN (254926)
• United States
7 Feb
Thanks for getting what I am saying. Finally, hubs has noticed everything I have been telling him for years. It’s not only the outside of our house and my clothes colors that I wear, exact boots, and my nightgown, but our cars and hubs clothes as well.
1 person likes this
@Marilynda1225 (91099)
• United States
7 Feb
@DianneN that is really creepy if its going as far as what you're wearing. That's really overstepping and would freak me out.
1 person likes this
@DianneN (254926)
• United States
7 Feb
@Marilynda1225 I am freaked out. I wait until their cars, which they leave in the driveway, are all gone before I go outside to garden, get the newspaper, and mail. Usually, hubs grabs the mail from his car when he returns from wherever he’s been. Now the old bag is usually lit up in her window watching me. I wish she’d go home.
@Traceyjayne (11362)
• United Kingdom
7 Feb
It’s nice that she likes your style but I would feel very uneasy if someone copied everything I did or wore or bought.
1 person likes this
@aninditasen (18198)
• Raurkela, India
7 Feb
That's very irritating at times when neighbours keep copying everything of your house. Hope they don't do something that may harm your house.
1 person likes this
@aninditasen (18198)
• Raurkela, India
10 Feb
@DianneN You can talk to them about it or give them some different ideas than your garden or home.
1 person likes this
@LindaOHio (222417)
• United States
7 Feb
What do they say about Imitation is the sincerest form of flattery. They must really like what you do with your home.
1 person likes this
@AmbiePam (120752)
• United States
6 Feb
I think they just admire your design style. They may not be sure how to make changes to their own place, and all they know is that they like what you do. Now, that being said, I wouldn’t want everything I did to be copied either. I just don’t know how you ask them to stop without being rude. It would be annoying.
1 person likes this
@DianneN (254926)
• United States
6 Feb
I don’t think there’s a way I could ask them to stop and let us be in a nice way. It’s so irritating to me. My husband tells me not to wave or be friendly, but she usually says hello to me first. I could compliment her on the white ankle boots exactly like mine and tell her that I love them, then see what she says.
1 person likes this
@LovingMyBabies (85923)
• Valdosta, Georgia
6 Feb
I would take it as a compliment. =) Maybe give her some new ideas and tell her what would look great for their yard and space.
1 person likes this
@DianneN (254926)
• United States
6 Feb
You’re way too nice. If she asked me anything, I would tell her. I don’t have to, because she came to ask our landscaper for a price to cut her lawn, used our tree removal service, used our excavator, uses our turf treatment service, asked me the name of our extremely expensive and exotic shrubs our island landscaper suggested and planted, etc. Her excavator waved to me and asked if I remembered him from the year before when he did our work. He told me she wanted an island just like mine. Well, he made us an island, but our special island landscaper extended it, built it up, and made tree, shrub, and flower suggestions for a fee, of course. I let her dig up any shrubs and flowers from our yard, let her and her mother take as many day lilies as they wanted (took them all), and have given her kids books, toys, etc. and food from my garden.
Imitation I supposed to be a compliment, but she’s taken everything way too far. I truly can’t stand it!
@LeaPea2417 (40029)
• Toccoa, Georgia
6 Feb
That is weird but in a way it is a compliment because they think you have good taste.
1 person likes this
@misunderstood_zombie (8765)
• United States
6 Feb
You made it! You're the one that everyone wants to be and to have their things look like your things. Congrats!
1 person likes this
