How can I forgive & forget?

i think you are quite justified in your action. most of the people would feel so in your situation. but what was the actual reason that she threw it in toilet?
its sometimes difficult to forget and forgive,

Oh I am so sorry that happened. I had a civil wedding and we didn't have a ring until now. It is really awful that I didn't get married at church and didn't even have a ring. I regret not being married in a church until now and not being able to wear a gown and a ring and walk down the aisle. I don't think your wife did the right thing of flushing her wedding ring..but with how the story goes ..I think she regrets it as much as you do. Why not ask her to marry you again ...a civil wedding will do and something memorable..with the new rings being blessed again with your love together with it. I would want that and I know you will feel much better wafter it happens.:)

The essence is your love to her, not the ring to her. Ask yourself whether you would still love her, even though she would keep her regular action or emotions. Will you forgive her twice if she would hurt you in the future. That is the point.

Hi there Jim, I must say either your wife was very sad and depressed or you really made her mad to toss her ring down the toilet.

If you forgive, then let it go. Stop dwelling on it. It is a ring. It is a symbol, but it is nothing but a ring. The marriage is not the ring.

I've been through this with my own family. My own daughter did the same. She has thrown away 3 sets of rings...she is mentally ill... and does things because she gets upset.. her husband is very tolerant and each time has gone and bought a new set.

Forgiveness is not forgiveness if you keep dwelling on it. Do you love your wife? Do you want to be with her? If you do, then you have to decide not to make this an issue between you.

i'm sorry to hear your story.
i have similar feeling with you.
two years ago, my miss right bought me a beautiful coat when i was birthday, but days ago she quarrl with me, and asked me give the coat back, i did so, she throw it into the garbage.
there are many similar things. i but her ring, i but her watch, i buy her necklace....... she drop them all when she was agry. after doing that she would ask me to forgive her. i don't care about the ring the necklace. but i do care about the feelings.

forgiving a person is easy to do but it's hard to forget what somebody did on you...i really upset many times and i forgive the person did it to me but until now i can't forget what they did...this is the battle that i always fight every second of my life to that i must learn how to forgive and how to forget...i tried many time to forget but i seems it doesn't work...hope i will win this battle.

Dude I think you have to forgive her cause you have to live whole life with her. you can't live with her properly whole life if you have something about her in your heart.
It's true that her act heart you, but you should have the habit of forgiveness. Many such events may take place in your life, You have to neglect them for smooth flow of your life. If she have ask pardon from you then forgive her as if she have don nothing. for example if your children do something which heart you, don't you forgive them??? because you love them.
Life is full of hurdles. you have to take act according to the situation. You can't give her divorce for silly reasons, so its better to for give her or any one if you want to compromise with the situation.

hey it nots compulsory to wear a wedding ring..if wedding ring is lost then forget about it!!


understand her feelings ...if she is sorry for dat....then nothing matters!

I would probably feel the same way had it occured to me. However, getting assured constantly by your wife that she really loves you and she regretted having done that and will never do the same thing is something to consider. After all, what matters is how both of you hold on to your oath when you got married that you would take care of each other and will fulfill your duties as a couple. That ring is sentimental but I think it's time for you to let go of that. It would be best if you forgive her now. We have to remember, it is also a way that God may forgive our own sins if we forgive others who sin against us. Matthew 6:14-15 says:
For if ye forgive men their trespasses, your heavenly Father will also forgive you: But if ye forgive not men their trespasses, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses.


Being challenged by situations like that is actually a blessing in disguise. Like every one else, I have sinned against other people too and I just think that by being treated bad by others (in some other ocassions) and forgiving them for that is a chance for me to be forgiven by God for those trespasses I committed in the past, especially if I don't have a chance to talk to the people I should ask forgiveness from. Just a thought.

A whole lot of responses went through my mind and I’ll say as I feel it. Firstly my sincere sympathies with you and I agree wholeheartedly too. As Bengali Hindus don’t have any wedding ring but we have a wedding saree and no amount of more expensive sarees that my hubby buys for me later, can ever compare to my wedding saree. I cant wear it everyday and in old age, I wont be able to carry it off too, but its one of my most precious possessions. So I understand that buying another wedding ring is not the same as the one you slipped on her finger. Secondly, as you are still happily married, I think you should take solace from the fact that she is more repentant and guilty-conscience for flushing the ring than you are for your behaviour and your not wearing your own ring is a kind of psychological torture to her. But above all, do remember that human life is transient, memory is permanent. If your wife goes before you, you will be left with remorse at having never been able to forgive her and then you will never forgive yourself either but by then it will be too late. So even if you cant forgive and forget, argue about it sometime, do let her know how hurt you were, rub it in real bad, make her cry, do whatever it takes to make you feel better, but wear your wedding ring.